I went to the website http://www.aureliarose.org/ and filled out an application to have them create a video for me. For Cameron. I got a response back within a day... I was amazed at how fast they wrote me back and stated they would be happy to make a video for me! I immediately started gathering the photos I had. They only allow up to 40 pictures on a DVD, yet, I was having trouble coming up with 40. Isn't that sad? My own child, and I struggle to find just 40 pictures... I wish I had taken more at the hospital. At least one of me holding him... kissing him. One of my parents hold him... their only grandchild. But I have none. So instead, I started trying to take pictures of things that symbolized him. Things that we have done for him since. And it took several months, but I finally submitted them all a couple of weeks ago.
I was anxious to get the DVD back. And once again, Katrina, the founder, was quick to respond to me and told me they were getting started on the DVD. There are several options of songs to choose from and different formats for the pictures to be seen on, but I chose the scrapbook format alongside of I Will Carry You. She kept me updated throughout the process and told me when they would be shipped out. They also provided multiple copies of the DVD so I could give to mine and Eric's parents, and my Aunt Elva, who was there to share in the joy of the only moment we got to spend with Cameron.
I received the DVD's, but was so scared to watch them. I didn't want to cry. Just recently, I've started feeling better than I have since I lost Cameron. I didn't want to go back to that dark place. So, I held the DVD's, but did not watch them until last week. And I was so moved and so surprised. Aurelia Rose did a beautiful job! And I wasn't sad! I felt a sense of hopefulness... a sense of peace that I did not expect. I was moved.... and happy. I saw my baby on there... I saw how much love there is for him... and I felt peace.
I love how grieving mother's do things like this for their children. This is their way of keeping their child's memory alive... of doing something for their child since their child is not in our physical world to cherish. I have been pondering about what I can do for Cameron... some mom's write names in sand, in the stars, on doves to send to other mothers. Others make scrapbook tags, handkerchiefs, videos like this! I've talked about it with Eric, but we're still at a loss of what our contribution can be. I know for Cameron's birthday, September 1st, I do want to make memory boxes to donate to the hospital for other mom's that have to go through this terrible loss. It's hard being in the hospital, in the maternity ward, delivering your nonliving child, when you know next door, that family is happy hearing their baby cry... and it was a different outcome for us. So, I am so grateful for Threads of Love in San Antonio, Texas that provided me with Cameron's memory box. I wasn't expecting it, but I love it so much.
Please consider donating to Aurelia Rose at their website. And other angel mommies out there reading this, visit Aurelia Rose to honor your babies. Such a beautiful way Katrina is remembering her daughter...