Friday, October 26, 2012

I'm a Mrs.!

I am married!  Cameron's parents are married!

I hope Cameron was with us and saw his parents take their vows toward each other. 

Eric and I got married on October 20th, this past Saturday.  At the beginning of the ceremony, we lit a memorial candle for those that have passed, and made a special prayer for our son, Cameron. 

I even kept on Cameron's necklace with his ashes throughout the wedding. 

Oh, my baby Cameron... you have changed my life so much.  Your dad is one of the best men I have ever met.  And the sweetest to me.  You've changed my career path... I am now working on my Masters in Social Work for you.  And now I am married to your dad! 

The wedding was beautiful.  For the most part.  There was drama at the end at the sort of "after party" in Eric and my suite.  We had people come up to continue celebrating with us, but the drama did not ruin our wedding, though people are still talking about it. 

I want to thank my parents sooooo much for this wedding. They really tried to make it the wedding of my dreams and if I had calmed down and didn't rush, I would have actually enjoyed it more and took it all in!  But I was so rushing through the whole thing... I don't even think I looked at myself in the mirror!  lol

So, now I am a Mrs.  I'm keeping my last name though... and I'm happy to know that Cameron can see his parents unite in their love for each other.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Been Busy

It's been a while since I wrote, but I have so busy.  I started working on my Masters, which I love, working, and planning for my wedding coming up this weekend!

This Masters degree is really taking up way more time than I thought it would.  I had no idea it would take this much and these many projects.  Way more than law school ever took from me.  So, I have quit my job.  And I feel good about it.  I felt bullied in my department and felt I did a considerable amount of the work without recognition.  It was tiring and putting a huge toll on me that I did not need.

Luckily, my fiance encouraged me and supported my decision to quit.  I am so lucky to have him.  I know it's going to be a struggle for us, but it's also for the best. The more and more I get into this degree, the more I realize that I am in the right place.  This degree fits me so well, it almost frustrates me that I didn't know about social work before!  :)  And, it's all because of my Cameron. 

So, this weekend I am getting married!  We will be doing a memorial candle before the ceremony starts to symbolize those that passed in our lives... and especially for my baby Cameron.  Oh, Cameron... everyday I think of him.  Everyday I worry if I'm forgetting him, but I know I'm not.  I'm not as sad as I used to be... and this kinda scares it.  It scares me because I feel that if I'm not sad, it's a form of forgetting.  But I know it's not.  I can never forget my angel.  I miss him all the time.  I think of him all the time....all the time.  When there is work in class I don't want to do, I remember that I am doing this for Cameron.

So, this was just a quick hello since I haven't written here for a while.  Next time I write, I'll be a Mrs.!